What if, you could imagine that you were embarking on…
A DIVORCE JOURNEY rather than … WWW III!
I know that divorce can be one of the most debilitating changes you will experience in your life. I get it, the emotions you experience when you are divorcing are the same grief cycle emotions as someone who has lost a loved one in death. To add to that grief, when you are divorcing and going through this grief cycle, you are also having to negotiate the divorce settlement with someone whom you were deeply connected to (and maybe still are). Not an easy thing to go through!
If you have children, you now have to figure out how to process all of these emotions for yourself, help you children process the loss of the intact family unit, and somehow still interact with the parent you are divorcing….for the rest of your life!
What if you were able to see your divorce more like a journey that you are embarking upon and less like a battle that needed to be won!
What if you could imagine that in this journey, you will have mountains to climb and valleys to walk through, you will have good times and bad times, and that you don’t have to go through this divorce journey alone ~ after all, when you take a journey you usually hire a guide to help you navigate!
I bet when you start thinking about a Journey (adventure or trip even), you begin to reach out and do research about where you are going. You will be asking (or thinking) questions such as: how do I get there, where do I stay, what do I need to prepare for ahead of time, what do I wear, where will I eat, how do I get around, and how long will I stay. You may even contact a travel agent as your guide to help you organize, plan, and navigate this journey.
A travel agent is not the expert in cooking the food, running the hotels, or even what should be packed, rather a travel agent is going to help you figure out:
• What you want to experience in the journey,
• What you want at the end of the journey,
• What’s most important to you,
• The resources and people you need that will fit your needs along your journey,
• and help you navigate throughout the journey when there are changes to the plans you made.
This is exactly what a Divorce Coach does for someone who is on their Divorce Journey!
A Divorce Coach helps you map out your divorce journey, helps you identify what you want, provides you resources that are right for your specific situation, and provides a roadmap for you so that you have a smoother transition into your post-divorce life.
I know, you might be saying, isn’t that what the attorney’s, mediators, and therapists do?
My answer is NO!
The legal professionals and therapists do not play this role nor do they have the skill set to be your guide in your Divorce Journey.
Don’t get me wrong, I highly recommend (no matter what divorce process you utilize), that you engage a family law attorney in your state to review your documents (even if you and your partner are doing your divorce by yourselves). And I definitely recommend that you reach out to a therapist when your ready to work on yourself.
It is just not the role of the legal professionals and/or the therapists, to help you map out your journey, get you prepared for your journey, show you all of your options, help you evaluate these options, and to help you begin setting up your new life.
It is a Divorce Coach that is your guide for your Divorce Journey and here’s how:
1. Planning the Divorce Journey:
Just as a Travel Agent helps plan every detail of a trip, a Divorce Coach assists you map out your divorce journey. They work with you to establish clear objectives, priorities, and a roadmap for a smoother transition into your post-divorce life.
2. Providing Emotional Support:
While therapists are adept at helping you delve into deep past emotional issues, Divorce Coaches offer a safe space for you to express your feelings and navigate the emotional turbulence that often accompanies divorce. A coach can help you identify your triggers and refocus your thoughts towards your future life while also identifying tools you can use to calm your triggers. A coach will help you keep your focus on your future goals so that you make decisions grounded in what you want rather than the raw emotions related to divorce.
3. Navigating the Legal Maze:
Divorce can involve complex legal processes and paperwork. A Divorce Coach, much like a travel agent handling travel logistics, can guide you to understand the various divorce processes, educate you on the various professionals and their roles, help you identify the right professionals to support you for your specific dynamic, and help you understand your options so that you make informed decisions.
4. Collaborative Problem-Solving:
Divorce Coaches excel in helping you strategize, communicate, and collaborate effectively with your soon to be ex-spouse and all the individuals supporting you through your divorce. Much like a travel agent who resolves travel-related issues for a smooth journey.
5. Financial Guidance:
Managing finances during and after divorce can be challenging. A Divorce Coach can help you collect, organize, and assimilate your financial information so that you are able to provide your financial information to anyone who requests it. In addition, a Divorce Coach will help you begin thinking about your new life by helping you create a budget, understand the financial implications of various decisions, and plan for your financial future, just as a travel agent helps you budget for your trip.
6. Goal-Oriented Support:
Divorce Coaches work with you to set specific divorce-related goals and support you in achieving them. Whether it’s co-parenting amicably, finding a new place to live, or rebuilding your social life, they are there to guide you every step of the way.
7. Focusing on the Present and Future:
Unlike therapy, which often delves into past traumas, a Divorce Coach primarily focuses on your present situation and future aspirations. They help you move forward and build a fulfilling post-divorce life.
8. Personalized Guidance:
Every divorce is unique, just like every traveler’s itinerary. A Divorce Coach tailors their approach to your individual needs, ensuring you receive personalized guidance and support.
There are many people divorcing that can navigate their divorce journey without a guide, however, when you are a parent, even if you could navigate this journey alone, trust me this is not a journey you want to navigate without a guide by your side!
Having a child-centered divorce coach, someone who will guide you through all of the above and also guide you in…
- determining the most appropriate parenting plan for your dynamics,
- learning how to set up the new business partnership called: co-parenting,
- learning how to communicate in your new business partnership called: co-parenting,
…is the key to ensuring that you and your children get on the right emotional path for your future lives’ ~ a path towards peace, happiness, and a family in two homes instead of one!
warmly,
~janet